Anthony Horowitz (Who Wrote That?) by Dennis Abrams

By Dennis Abrams

Profiles the existence and occupation of the writer Anthony Horowitz.

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30 In the original story, private detective Sam Spade is hired by a colorful assortment of crooks to find a valuable statue of a bird once owned by the Knights of Malta: the Maltese Falcon. In his affectionate satire, Anthony takes a slightly different spin on the story. As Booklist described it in its 2004 review: Thirteen-year-old Nick is the younger (and brighter) half of the Diamond Brothers, the world’s worst detective agency. Dwarf Johnny Naples becomes their client entrusting the two with a mysterious package (a box of Malteser chocolates) just before he is killed, leaving Tim Diamond, literally, holding the gun.

Another aspect of her bad table manners was her tendency to steal the silver. After lunch with Granny, Mr. Warden would insist on a spoon count. Wolfgang and Irma would spend hours in the pantry checking off the pieces that remained against the pieces that had been laid and then writing down a long list of what would have to be replaced. When Granny left the house at half past four or whenever, her twenty-seven-year-old coat would be a lot bulgier then when she arrived, and as she leaned over to kiss Joe goodbye, he would hear the clinking in her pockets.

One wet afternoon at the advertising agency. And it was wet, I remember it raining. I was bored, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. And without any planning or structuring or thinking, I just wrote the opening page of a children’s book. I just remember writing “Frederick K. Bauer was the most unpleasant boy in the world” or something to that effect . . And I finished it, Did you know... Did you know that Anthony Horowitz wrote The Kingfisher Book of Myths and Legends for a straight fee, rather than for royalties per copy sold?

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